Big Love/Mormon Temple Ceremony Controversy

There’s much commotion over the upcoming episode of HBO’s Big Love which is to contain a scene depicting the Temple Endowment ceremony of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints [aka the Mormons].

I wanted to weigh in with my thoughts; both as a former Mormon who’s been to the temple numerous times as well as a fan of Big Love. For a long time I’ve been asked about what actually goes on in Mormon Temples but I never engage in any discussions about it since I took blood oaths not to. However, various websites feature both text versions and video re-enactments of parts of this ceremony thus the information is readily available and amazingly accurate. Although I can understand why Mormons are upset over a television show’s depiction of their ceremony, it is hard to sympathize. It seems when they hold something sacred they expect the world to take heed yet when the shoe is on the other foot there is no accountability for their actions. They seem to feel justified in the name of their religion and beliefs. (Some example are: Jewish Holocaust Victims being baptized, Proposition 8 eliminating the right for same-sex couples to marry who'd already been given the right, even their own member’s who are “unworthy” to attend the weddings of their own family). Being offended works both ways.

My wife and I have been fans of Big Love since the beginning. As former Mormons, it’s intriguing to us as well as just plain good entertainment. The show has been featuring mainstream Mormon characters (not just the offshoot Polygamy-practicing characters) as well as actual mainstream Mormon issues and we’ve been pleased with how spot on the portrayals have been. The show has tackled some tough issues, such as the Mormon’s treatment of African Americans and Indians (thought to have been cursed by God with dark skin). There was also an accurate portrayal of a mainstream Mormon couple wishing to adopt. The couple consisted of a wife and her husband who is admittedly gay, yet encouraged [by his church] to marry a woman anyway and work to get over “Same Sex Attraction” [as the Mormons call it]. The irony is that the polygamist characters on Big Love are actually living the original teachings of the Mormon church; what they consider the truth based on the teachings of Joseph Smith (who was the founder of the Mormon church, first prophet and practice polygamy) as opposed to “mainstream” Mormons who discontinued the practice as a condition of gaining statehood. Of course, I don’t agree with “original” polygamist Mormonism any more than “mainstream” Mormonism. Although after watching an episode of Big Love when I jokingly asked my wife if I could take another wife, she replied: “If she’ll help cook and clean then bring her on over!”


  1. Just found your blog. Great post! I am looking forward to hearing more of your stories since it sounds like you have quite an interesting history to draw from.

  2. I'm proud of you and your wife to intelligently question the Mormon church and come to the informed decision that it is false. I'm thankful I also came to that decision and my wife and I are very happy.

  3. I myself am a mormon, but I am struggling with a desire to leave the church. Everyday I feel like I'm being suffocated even more there is so much confusion in my head from being told something your entire life and having a gut feeling that it's not right. It's so nice having your point of view I really appreciate it. I just have one question what made you finally have the courage to leave and how did you do it?

  4. Good on you for sharing your experiences via this blog! God bless you in sharing your truth. Who knows--maybe you'll even pull the wool off of an LDS member and open their lives to Jesus Christ.

    As a Christian who grew up with many Mormon friends, I've never felt "anti" Mormon. Most of the Mormons I grew up with were from really kind, good-hearted families and lived their lives like most American teenagers. Some succumbed to temptation at times (haven't we all?) and some didn't. There were some Mormons I knew who were self-righteous and critical of other religions (particularly the catholic church). However, I found that to be expected too. No grouping of people is going to be all nice, right? And generally, from my experience at least, I felt mormons to be much nicer than your average.

    However, it hurt me in my spirit and in my heart to know that so many of my kindhearted Mormon friends and their families were being lead astray by a false prophet, especially because I felt that if they had known the truth about their church...they would have been Christian. I believe that the positive things they felt, experienced, and believed in about mormonism were just the borrowings from Christianity.

    My hope is that a blog like yours and the growing post/ex-mormon community and literature will help reach these lost sheep. Without all the lies and additions of joseph smith and his corporate brothers's taintings, I hope that lost mormons can have the pure joy of Christ's grace.

    To Anonymous, when you get the courage up to leave the lds church (do so as soon as you can). please give Jesus Christ a chance. Open your heart to him and read the Word. He loves you and will save you by through his loving grace. God bless :)

  5. For those who say with conviction that the Mormon church is false I ask where does your proof come from? I also ask why you think that as Mormons we don't give our hearts to Jesus Christ? I am dumbfounded by that since for me a Mormon, it's all about Jesus Christ. I have felt his atoning sacrifice time and time again in my life and I know it's by his grace that I am worth anything at all. I love my Savior and am so grateful to Him for his love.


No, we aren't Mormon any longer and don't follow "their" rules, but we really appreciate comments that don't contain swearing. Thank you.